Life lists and babies

[vc_row][vc_column][vc_column_text]I can’t believe I’m writing this, but I think they days of procrastinating about having babies is coming to an end. It’s such a strange concept for me. Giulio and I have been married for almost 4 years, but we’re the only one of our friends who have tied the knot and suffice to say, none of them are thinking about kids.

But since I’m nearing the ripe old age of 29 and want to have three kids, I don’t think I can put it off any longer. I can hear my mother in law whooping with joy. She’s been breaking my chops about having kids for years.

As much as I love the idea of just letting it happen, I don’t think I could handle the chaos. I couldn’t just wake up one day and discover I was pregnant. But at the same time I don’t want to become obsessed about making this happen. I don’t want to turn into a baby factory where my every action in and out of the bedroom is regulated by making a mini me.

Like most things in life, I’m looking for a happy medium, which means maximum planning of everything except the baby making part. In a couple of months, we will be retiring the goal keeper – you should have seen the shock on Giulio’s face when I told him yesterday – I think he still thinks of himself as a 21-year-old uni student with not a care in the world.

But before that happens, I’ve told him that he we need to make three life lists – one for each of our own personal goals and one for our collective goals. It sounds strange, I know, but it’s really important to me that we continue to pursue our goals and personal interests while we’re starting a family. I don’t want having children to become my life. I don’t think it’s healthy for me or my kids. I want to continuing being more than just mum.



I didn’t read about doing this in a parenting or self-help book, so don’t quote me on it, but I think it’s a really good idea and will definitely help us put things into perspective, shape the big picture and map out what we want to do and where we want to be in the next couple of years. It’s something that is even more important for expats and people who work for themselves. It’s so easy for us to get bogged down in our day to day projects and forget about shaping our future.

So what’s on the list?

Well for me, it’s things like improving my personal portfolio, finishing the cookbook of all my grandmother’s recipes, building this blog and dedicating myself more to my freelance writing. For Giulio, it’s things like getting his client base up to 200, finishing his five-year stint as tourism assessor and turning his focus back to his business.

When it comes to our collective list, it’s a bit more mundane. Paying off as much of our loan as we can, saving at least €20,000 in the bank, selling Giulio’s old university bachelor pad in Perugia, finishing the back garden and finally figuring out how to rid our house of mould.

Obviously there is no way we can do all these things before the end of this year, but that’s not really the point. The entire exercise is about writing down the things you want to achieve and putting in steps to make them happen before the baby sweeps everything to the sidelines.

I’m not really sure what I want to do with these lists. I’m thinking about mocking them up on beautiful stationary and putting them somewhere we can see them, actually work towards them and be inspired by them – maybe the fridge? It sounds so tacky, but I’m thinking the fridge and I even have a few design ideas in mind.


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